Values - They Determine Our Mission and Our Purpose in Life

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Each person holds their own values and these in turn determine our mission in life. They determine our purpose in life. They determine what we feel is important to us. At different times in our lives, with the different situations we find ourselves in, certain values are brought more to the fore ground. So at one stage one value can be more important than at another moment and thus determine how we are going to react to a given situation. Because they are so fundamental to the decision making process, i.e. our behavior, it is important to be aware of the values we hold.

Our values are the emotions we believe are most important to feel or avoid. So, they determine what is important to us, what we care about. Stress comes about when a person is not living up to his values, when he or she is doing things in life that are not in alignment with his or her values. Some values are more important, more dominant to us than others. We are more at peace with ourselves when we live up to our core values on a consistent basis. These core values have great influence on all aspects of our life. So, if a person is suffering with stress in his or her life, then a value elicitation exercise will be a good exercise to raise the awareness of what they are not happy with.

As it is so fundamental to a person's behavior it is good practice to elicit the values early on in the coaching relationship. This will give you insight into why you do what you do. As we are beings of meaning it also helps to give meaning to our existence. You can even start to recognize your true purpose in life is. Through your values you become aware of your potential and what contribution you can make to the world at large.

It is very rewarding to elicit your values as this, without exception, uncovers a beautiful individual. Values stand for great positive strengths in each individual. This collection of positive aspects will show a wonderful unique character. It gives a feeling of reverence and respect to one's own being. It helps you to get onto the path called fulfillment.

Fulfillment comes into being when you are living up to your own values and when you are actively developing your own potential. You could see your values as your compass. Your values determine your mission in life. You are more able to engage in the flow of life when you live according to your values. You are more able to take positive action, rather than having the feeling of being tossed around by outer circumstances. So, knowing your values helps you to determine your direction in life.

As we live in a world of relationships, it is important to realise that each entity holds it own values, be it another individual, a company, a country or religion. The reason for this is that these values determine the behavior of that entity and this in turn affects our relationship to it. In working together on a common goal, it is important to be aware of whether the goal is in accord with the values that are held by each. A successful company is often a company where the individuals honor similar values. So, for a company it is important to work towards
bringing together a workforce with a value system that can be held collectively.

One stumbling block in eliciting values can be language. Words can have different meaning to different people. So, similar values can sometimes be described by different words.

Values spur us on to undertake action and fulfil our goals, dreams and desires. So by being aware of our values we can more easily generate our motivation to go out and take action to realise these visions and create our own destiny. All along when you are developing these wonderful qualities in your life, you are polishing your awareness of your values as you are living up to them in your life. This will result in new revelations for you and this is how I see that we are amassing spiritual goods. Worldly goods we can not take with us when we pass away from this life but, to me it seems that the qualities that we develop during our life time by living a life true to our own nature are
the harvest that we will take with us and share with the greater good.

One way to find out the values you hold is discussed in my book.

About the Author:

"Life Is Wonderful Make IT Happen!" by Dr. Wouter Havinga, "The brilliance of Dr Havinga is in writing this book from experience and passion for life. I have read several "improve-yourself" books; many made no change in my life, though some gave me hope. This one differs in a colossal way from the rest." Dr. Havinga's book is available at . Dr. Havinga has worked in the substance misuse service and worked with "Motivational Interviewing Techniques", "Solution Focused Brief Therapy" and building self esteem and is a life coach and NLP practitioner. Copyright © 2006 Wouter Havinga

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